• self-relationship sets the blueprint for external relationships
    • You can only love others as much as you love yourself
    • You can only belong as much as you accept yourself
    • Until we receive with an open heart, we cannot truly give with one
    • We judge others as we judge ourselves
    • When we don’t give ourselves permission to be free, we rarely tolerate that freedom in others
  • The reverse: feeling loved can facilitate self-love, but only if the person is open to receiving it (unlearn self-rejection)
  • NOT ‘treating others by how you want to be treated’
    • One-way: value → behavior, rather than ↔︎
    • What if you don’t know / don’t treat yourself well
    • Self-compassion need to be learned first