Paradoxically, accepting traits promotes overcoming them
Curiously, understanding that it is innate seems to help to cure it. One trio of therapists, reading about the new results emerging from genetics, switched from trying to treat their clients’ shyness to trying to make them content with whatever their innate predispositions were. They found that it worked. The clients felt relieved to be told that their personality was a real, innate part of them and not just a bad habit they had got into. ‘Paradoxically, depathologising people’s fundamental inclinations and giving group members permission to be the way they are seemed to constitute the best insurance that their self-esteem and interpersonal effectiveness would improve.’ In other words, telling them they were naturally shy helped them overcome that shyness.
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